As a new parent, it may seem that you are constantly on the receiving end of parenting advice.  Sometimes we can benefit from the wisdom of parents who have been through it all, and in these times the advice is quite welcome.  But other times, well-meaning friends and family may try to push us into doing things their way.

Attachment parents often face this problem, especially when their parents implemented a different parenting style.  In many cases, parenting methods are passed down from generation to generation in a family.  When someone breaks from tradition, the family elders may react unfavorably.

It's not too hard to understand these types of reactions when you stop and think about it.  Our parents raised us in a certain way, and when we decide to raise our children differently, it may make them feel like we think they did something wrong.  They may also feel that all of the previous generations of the family turned out fine, so raising your kids in a different way is, in their eyes, a mistake.

While it's important to understand the reasons that our predecessors may not like the idea of attachment parenting, it's more important to raise our children in the way we see fit.  We must develop our own parenting style while respecting that of our parents, and their parents before them.  Here's how:

• Let your parents know that your decision to be an attachment parent doesn't mean that you don't think they did a good job.  It's just what you feel is best for you and your children.

• Discuss what being an attachment parent means.  There are lots of misconceptions about the practices involved.  In reality, it is simply a philosophy of being sensitive to your child's needs, not a bunch of rules set in stone.  Your parents may have the wrong idea about attachment parenting, and they might be surprised to learn that it's not necessarily all that different from how they raised you.

• Ask your parents what they did in raising you that was different from the way that they were raised.  Try to do this in a non-confrontational way, and you will probably find that they did a number of things differently.  This will illustrate the point that individuality in parenting styles is not a bad thing.

Once you put your parents' (and perhaps grandparents') fears that you disapprove of them as parents to rest, they will usually be more willing to accept your decision to be the type of parent you want to be.  But there are times when you may just have to agree to disagree.  Just don't let anyone, no matter how much you love them and value their opinions, push you into parenting in a way that goes against your beliefs.  At the end of the day, you have to answer to yourself, not them.

To learn more about attachment parenting, check out these resources. If you'd like to give or get support, join the attachment parenting group in the community!